Selecting The Right Therapist Jesmond
Counselling is a personal experience.
Your counsellor will understand you, in a unique way, that few (if any) others, do.
It's easy to feel exposed or intimidated, when starting out, until a rapport is established with your counsellor. A good choice of counsellor can help you see a new perspective on life, and money well spent.
Finding The Right Therapist/Talk Therapist
Finding the right counsellor means developing a therapeutic association which is based on:
- Secure - Feeling safe is a pre-requisite, before we can open up and reveal personal aspects of our worries, to anyone.
- Approval - A competent therapist should help you feel unconditionally accepted, no matter your feelings you have about a particular event. The right counsellor will help pace the feelings and experiences you're describing, while allowing you to express all the associated feelings, untethered.
- Partnership - Working together with your counsellor should feel like a partnership. Clients need the counsellor to lead the session, set a safe space, and assist with new perspectives needed. Likewise, the client needs to be fully willing to answer questions and speak their truth, to enable results to be achieved. A mutually supportive, collaborative environment can help you get the change you want quickly, with the minimum of discomfort.
- Equality - Mutual understanding and appreciation is required throughout your counselling session and should underline all your work in the therapy room. e.g. If the speed of work is causing too much upset, or discomfort, speak to your therapist about slowing down so that you match each other's pace, and expectations. Also bear in mind, that no matter how emotionally painful something may feel in the short term, it's important to trust that the counsellor is leading you towards a comfortable resolution. Once you have developed a few positive experiences with a counsellor, of revealing a small issue, and successfully working through it, trust can grow, mutual respect can widen, and motivation can increase, making further progress easier.
- Active Listener - Thorough counsellors are accomplished at active listening. Understanding non-verbal communication during a session is often just as important for a counsellor, as words spoken aloud. Ensure you are willing to listen to the counsellor when they do talk - as they could be attempting to help you give a more forgiving meaning, to a troublesome event, and thus ease your pain. Rather than giving your rote-learned responses to your therapists questions, try to do your own active listening, instead. Interesting results can be achieved by listening intently to the therapist's question, as though it's the first time you'd heard it.
- Compassion - We all have an intuitive need to connect with others, and have our experiences and interpretations acknowledged as being real, and acceptable. It's important to be able to feel that your counsellor is empathetic to your concerns and upsets, understands how and why you feel the way you do, and yet is also willing and able to help lead you to a better place about the issues you're bringing to therapy.
- Hopeful - Most of us begin the counselling journey at a place where we do desperately need hope. Most commonly we've tried everything we can, on our own, to feel better, but were unable. How fast you see results from counselling varies from one individual to another - but it's not a sudden series of overnight wins - more like a gradual campaign of change. Take comfort and faith from the smallest of breakthroughs made during a session - and allow it to build your hope of even better breakthroughs, in future sessions. Hope is a trait we all need, whether we're undertaking counselling or not. What experience does your counsellor have with your issue specifically? How have they helped others, like you, in the past? Use these questions to decide if this counsellor's experience matches your expectations.
- Trust - Knowing that, when we do put forth our concerns, we can trust a counsellor to assist in the most appropriate way, no matter how deep our emotions or feelings, can allow even the deepest wounds to heal. In counselling, most of us reveal aspects of ourselves and our feelings, we don't reveal to anyone else, even family or loved ones. More personal hurts can be healed by working with a qualified counsellor, than by attempting to heal ourselves. We need to trust the counsellor not only with the hurt involved in a particular event we're working on, but also to navigate the counselling and healing journey as a whole. However, if the counsellor always agreed with you, they would be a very well paid friend...correct? Their job is different. Feeling better means giving different meanings to old events - this means challenging you on the conclusions you've made, and the beliefs you hold. This can feel uncomfortable at the time, but trust is required, that the gains will be worth it. A professional with more specialism in your particular area of concern may help here.
- Perception - The counsellor has the acumen, vision, and understanding to help you identify and remedy, areas where a better perspective on the event(s), may help. Having the insight to see what meanings need to be changed, to feel better, is something best left to the professionals. A therapist who recognises this quickly, can help you generate desired changes, quickly.
Depression Counselling In Jesmond
Depression is debilitating in that it is one of the few issues in life where the issue itself can prevent us from getting help for the issue - depression can stop us getting the help we need.
Counselling can help with both short term and chronic depression, helping you identify and correct the day to day thinking patterns as well as understand the root cause.
Some also look at other options for depression, such as herbal remedies e.g. St John's Wort, or supplements such as 5 Hydroxy-Tryptophan. Always seek the advice of your medical professional, for these items.
There's more info on depression, here.
Ring us direct on 0191 580 3700 to check on availability and pricing of counselling in Jesmond.
Anxiety Counselling In Jesmond
The root of anxiety is often based in our learned associations - a repeated experience of negative reinforcement with something specific, can become a more generalised problem later in life, without realising.
Techniques used by counsellors may help reduce the serverity of the anxiety reaction you're used to, as well as help you understand how the pattern of anxiety has developed.
Sometimes anxiety only occurs in very specific situations. These can be associated with just one event in the past (if traumatic) enough, where we've learned to fear a certain set of circumstances or events.
Working on the associations of the past in this way, can often ease the anxiety experienced in present day life.
Progress can be made on anxiety when we realise the fear is attributable not to the original stimulus itself - but what we thought it meant. Once we learn to make the distinction between the two, fear is usually lessened.
After discussing how anxiety impacts you in daily life, its patterns, and repeating elements, your therapist can provide options on the best treatment methods for you, to provide lasting results.
Counselling help for anxiety is available. Call us direct on 0191 580 3700 to arrange.
All relationships go through turbulence, no matter who we are. In fact, relationships with those closest to us, like family, are often the most difficult. Contrasting viewpoints can arise as a result of upbringing, religion, schooling, or even simple generational differences. All of these can cause seemingly insurmountable issues, without help.
Marriages or civil partnerships can come under strain from issues like contrasting interests, differing priorities, and disagreements about what's important in life.
Both people in a relationship can benefit, either from acute help for an urgent relationship difficulty, or ongoing work on relationship communication and interaction.
Understanding and anticipating what your partner wants and expects from the relationship, needs daily work, and most couples are not clear on this.
A counsellor has the training and insight required to assist both parties to see the history and real reasons behind each individual's behaviour, and thus allow clearer communication to flow.
Even just a few insights from a private relationship therapist can give tremendous progress in how you experience your relationship.
To find out more about relationship counselling, see our main page here.
Or, to arrange relationship counselling now, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700, or ask for a callback, on the form opposite. We'll ring you back at a convenient time.
We usually think of a friend or loved one dying, when we think of bereavement and grief. However, loss can be more subtle, yet just as profound, when it manifests differently. Substantial emotional symptoms can result from (e.g.) loss of function due to retirement, loss of purpose when children move out, or loss of contact with children, when separating due to divorce.
Many find it difficult to even begin grieving, and feel stuck in a state of dissociation. Others are stuck in a longer term pattern of grief which can be harmful in it's own way.
Grief counselling is available to help you begin to process long or short term grief, in a supportive, structured, and safe space.
Find out more about bereavement counselling.
To arrange sessions of grief counselling, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700 and we'll get things moving.
Anger is often the result of one of our most basic beliefs or values being contradicted.
Anger can also be caused by too many "shoulds" in life, making it easy for self or others to break self-set rules, thus resulting in anger.
Irregular bouts of anger can crop up during particularly stressful times or life events, and can be managed temporarily by attempting to alleviate stress in general.
Rather than manage symptoms alone, counselling for anger issues is more likely to help by analysing how previous events in life have led to a pattern of angry behaviour, over time.
While practical tools and in-the-moment techniques are enough for many, it may benefit those looking for a longer term solution to focus on counselling instead of anger management.
See our main page on anger counselling.
Our therapists can normally help with counselling for anger issues. To ask a question or check on availability, you can reach us on 0191 580 3700.
Often we are unaware of the impact an emotional trauma has, until much later.
When an event happens in the outside world which goes against our understanding of life, it results in trauma, that is unprocessed.
Breaking these norms of experience can result in trauma - and feelings of isolation, loss of appetite, lack of socialising, dissociation and lack of interest in life.
Trauma is usually thought of as one-off, traumatic events, which we typically associate with war veterans, victims of crime, or domestic abuse, for example.
Smaller episodes of emotional distress are often dismissed as irrelevant and potentially less deserving of treatment. However the long term effects can be just as damaging as very obvious trauma.
A trauma counsellor can help with both types of trauma. Some have additional qualifications to assist with specialist interventions such as EMDR, or NLP techniques that have been effective with trauma sufferers in the past.
Taking the step the get counselling can feel scary at first. But your counsellor has seen and heard emotional complaints of every size and type over their experience.
We have more info on trauma counselling options on our main page here.
To get your trauma counselling questions answered, ring us direct, on 0191 580 3700.
Addiction Counselling Jesmond
Addiction to a substance or behaviour, usually happens incrementally, over time, and outside our conscious awareness.
It's easy to establish a dependence on some means to cope, in the face of unusually high stressors, or an event we weren't expecting.
It's surprisingly easy to continue using this one coping mechanism in this way, and thus end up using it as the *only* coping mechanism, whenever stress arises.
This can be a dangerous time - as too much overuse of one coping mechanism can convince us that the level of stress we're under - is ok.
While most present with an addiction to a substance like alcohol or drugs, an increasing number are developing behavioural addictions which could benefit from counselling, such as collecting or hoarding behaviour, viewing pornography obsessively, or compulsive shopping.
Counselling can help you overcome addiction by first understanding the benefit you get, from the substance or behaviour itself. Addiction counselling can also provide short term coping mechanisms and signposting toward support channels until long term gains are made.
For advice on addiction counselling options, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700.
Getting Started With Counselling
How It Works
How often do you expect counselling sessions? What progress do you expect to make? Define fast and slow progress? These expectations can cary widely, so make sure you and your therapist agree on the details, from the outset.
Costs of the first session can be anything from free, to £100 or more in busy areas. Check the specifics with your counsellor. Sometimes the first session is allocated a standard rate.
Normally when beginning counselling, you and your therapist will agree on the goals and outcome you want to achieve, and set a timeline for treatment, and how many sessions you'll complete together. It's important to do this from the outset so that you understand each others' expectations, and the following sessions can focus on the counselling itself and not the practical elements.
Get Answers For These Important Questions
Answers to the following questions can help you track down the most appropriate therapist for your needs.
What action do we take if I don't get any benefit from counselling?
- It's important, throughout the sessions you have, to check in with your therapist about the progress you're making, and your expectations of results and timeline going forward. This also helps the therapist navigate your sessions together to be the most comfortable experience possible.
How long will this take?
- Understand that this is a question with no one fixed, correct, answer. You're looking here for more of how the counsellor reacts, rather than the content of the answer. In reality, duration will depend on multiple factors:
- Elements from the past, that surface during treatment, that require treatment before the primary complaint can be attended to.
- Inability to predict how many aspects of a given event will require resolution, in what order, and how many times, before feeling emotionally better.
- Each individual processes emotions and changes of meaning, at a different rate, that is unique to them. We all heal at different rates - this is normal.
It is for all the above reasons, that no therapist, can provide a concrete answer to this question - only what their intuition tells them.
In terms of timescales, you both need to allow enough time to open up, access, and feel better about painful long term memories. A longer time frame commitment from you, gives the therapist greater confidence in opening up longer term issues for work, they otherwise wouldn't do, with only a shorter time frame available. Looking at these more difficult events can take a longer time period. Where possible, try to avoid stopping counselling sessions unexpectedly, as doing so can raise the risk of attempting to deal with open or raw emotions without appropriate support.
Do you have specific expertise in any one area?
- Some counsellors can work a lifetime in only one problem area - making them very specialist - and sometimes more sought after. It's always good to understand the background of your potential therapist, and how that matches your experience, before beginning counselling.
How quickly can I begin?
- Therapists are usually busy people, with little spare time between sessions. Getting logistics sorted out now, will help later.
Therapy Help Jesmond
Our counsellors are self-employed and independent. We can usually offer counselling sessions at most locations throughout Tyne & Wear, including Jesmond, by arrangement.
How To Book Counselling Sessions
To get started with counselling, or just for an initial chat, we're available on 0191 580 3700.
Our counsellors adhere to the BACP code of ethics and practice.
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