COUNSELLING SEATON BURN
Finding The Right Counsellor Seaton Burn
Counselling is a personal experience.
Your counsellor will understand you, in a unique way, that few (if any) others, do.
Professionals are used to dealing with life's personal details, but you may not be so used to opening up in this way. A strong counselling relationship can significantly change your outlook and perspective on key areas of life - it's important to get it right.
Finding The Right Counsellor
The following elements should be present, between you and your counsellor, for best results:
- Safety - If we don't have an underlying sense of safety in therapy, from the outset, it's unlikely progress will be made.
- Acceptance - Without the confidence that whatever we say, whatever interpretation we've given of a certain event, will be accepted, it can be hard to reveal much of our feelings, in order to get over them. The right counsellor will help pace the feelings and experiences you're describing, while allowing you to express all the associated feelings, untethered.
- Teamwork - Find someone who you can work together with easily, for best outcomes. Clients need the counsellor to lead the session, set a safe space, and assist with new perspectives needed. Equally, the counsellor depends on you to be as honest and open as possible, or they have nothing to work with, and little progress can be made. Your relationship with your therapist runs both ways, so that you achieve the change you're paying money for.
- Consideration - Let understanding and appreciation flow equally between you and your counsellor, to help achieve a stronger counselling relationship. e.g. Achieving results too quickly can actually be a bad thing!...if it causes too much discomfort. Be willing to change pace to match your counsellor, within reason. Understand that, even through the difficult sessions, the counsellor has a clear path ahead for you, and knows what they are doing. Small wins can be the catalyst encouraging longer term gains, as the counselling relationship continues.
- Paying Attention - Is your counsellor alert and absorbing your feedback and input during sessions? A counsellor's silence can often be mistaken by the client as boredom or lack of interest. However, an experienced therapist is often ascertaining more from silence, or how the client fills in that silence - than the spoken word. Other times, the therapist may need you to listen - as they guide you towards seeing something from a different perspective. This can be challenging as we have invested a lot of time and energy in our pre-existing beliefs. Rather than giving your rote-learned responses to your therapists questions, try to do your own active listening, instead. However, concentrating on the questions asked, and providing answers that are unfiltered, and represent your true thoughts and feelings, will help you achieve results noticeably better, than simply responding with what you think you should respond with.
- Validation - The meanings we give to events, are as varied as human beings themselves. It's important that we feel our meanings are reasonable, given the circumstances. An empathetic therapist hears and understands your issues, but also has the insight to guide you toward an even more helpful perspective.
- Confidence - We don't usually start therapy in a confident place. We usually need therapy help, because we've tried to overcome the issues ourselves, but without success. The counselling journey is not normally fast - it is a process. Sometimes getting wins from counselling is a combination of small wins initially, plus a lot of faith of greater future gains. Optimism about the future, and about what's possible, are important in life, regardless of whether you've felt the need for counselling help or not. To build hope from the start, ask your counsellor about their previous successes, in cases similar to yours. They won't disclose personal details, but the general picture they give you can help build confidence that this is a journey worth taking.
- Trust - The inner child, in all of us, seeks to protect us above all else. If the environment is not supportive of vulnerable issues surfacing, they will not be allowed to do so. Counselling usually involves revealing extremely personal feelings that we feel vulnerable about. We can often feel more able to fully open up to a third party professional, someone who is not attached to our family or circumstances. Have confidence that your counsellor sees the bigger picture map of where you want to go, but is also adept enough to help you heal the small hurts along the way, too. However, the therapist will not always be accommodating, like a friend. Expect your beliefs, values, and opinions, to be shaken up, and looked at closely - this is where much of the healing potential lies. This can feel uncomfortable at the time, but trust is required, that the gains will be worth it. There are two ways to make this easier - (I) do not tackle bigger issues in counselling until you've built confidence with your therapist by tackling small issues first; or (ii) look for a therapist who, from the outset, has longer experience, or more experience with your personal issues.
- Perspective - A key reason people attend therapy is they feel - stuck - with a particular circumstance or set of feelings. A counsellor can help you identify practical actions that may help - but more importantly - highlight new perspectives that help you feel better, too. Judgements are required, often very quickly mid-session, in respect of which values or opinions need to be challenged to improve overall mental health, as opposed to those which can do not contribute so much to the bigger picture, or are secondary to other more important goals. Your long term mental health can make great gains, where these fine distinctions are clearly recognised.
Depression Counselling In Seaton Burn
Depression is an issue that presents us with a unique challenge - how does someone with depression, who feels unworthy of help, who may believe they cannot get better - seek help for depression? It can become a vicious circle all too easily.
Counselling can help with both short term and chronic depression, helping you identify and correct the day to day thinking patterns as well as understand the root cause.
Other mental health options beyond counselling such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy have also proven effective for depression and are widely used in the NHS.
There's more info on depression, here.
To get the counselling options in Seaton Burn, contact us direct, by calling 0191 580 3700, or completing the form opposite.
Anxiety Counselling In Seaton Burn
The root of anxiety is often based in our learned associations - a repeated experience of negative reinforcement with something specific, can become a more generalised problem later in life, without realising.
A counsellor can help you identify how the past contributes to a current day pattern of anxiety in your life, and how to work on it, so that it produces less of an overt reaction in day-to-day life.
More specific anxiety such as acute episodes of panic or panic attacks, also have their roots often in the past, perhaps with a one-off specific experience, or association to an event, that we don't consciously realise.
Deconditioning work can be undertaken with a therapist's help, to help untangle the meanings attached to an original event, and thus feel better about it - and less anxious.
Progress can be made on anxiety when we realise the fear is attributable not to the original stimulus itself - but what we thought it meant. Once we learn to make the distinction between the two, fear is usually lessened.
Your counsellor is best placed to guide you through the best options for you, that will provides the greatest relief over time.
More info about counselling for anxiety is available on our main page here.
Relationships can be the most difficult aspect of life to navigate, as they bring opposing viewpoints and models of the world, into close contrast, frequently. We all experience relationship difficulties, because, quite simply, we are all individuals, with unique backgrounds, history, upbringing, and values.
For romantic relationships, issues such as infidelity, differences over children, parenting, money, habits, and simply the busy nature of daily life can decay an otherwise strong and healthy relationship.
Refreshing your ability to relate to each other, in a healthy way, where understanding is clear and meaning is retained, can make real differences for both individuals.
Understanding and anticipating what your partner wants and expects from the relationship, needs daily work, and most couples are not clear on this.
A counsellor has the training and insight required to assist both parties to see the history and real reasons behind each individual's behaviour, and thus allow clearer communication to flow.
Paying for counselling means getting focussed and attentive help targeting the most personal and life-changing issues humans go through.
Get more info on our main page for relationship and marriage counselling, here.
Or, to arrange relationship counselling now, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700, or ask for a callback, on the form opposite. We'll ring you back at a convenient time.
We usually think of a friend or loved one dying, when we think of bereavement and grief. But we all experience loss differently, and to differing degrees, depending on what the loss relates to. Losing a job due to unemployment, a partner due to divorce, or contact with a family member can result in loss, and the associated emotional issues to overcome.
Many find it difficult to even begin grieving, and feel stuck in a state of dissociation. It's also possible to become stuck in a never-starting, or never-ending cycle of grief, which carries its own complications.
Whether for long or short term grief issues, grief counselling can provide essential support that is often unavailable from other sources.
Full info on grief counselling is available here.
To get started with grief counselling, call us direct, on 0191 580 3700.
Anger Counselling Seaton Burn
Anger is often the result of one of our most basic beliefs or values being contradicted.
Too many internal emotional restrictions, often self-imposed, limit our viewpont as to what is acceptable in life, and exacerbate anger.
Periodic angry episodes happen to us all, but more frequent or uncontrollable anger is more likely to require intervention and therapeutic help.
Anger counselling aims to help understand the root cause of the anger better, in order to overcome the pattern of angry behaviour and feelings in your life.
It may be that for one individual, both counselling and anger management are suitable for different stages of the individual's journey. They are not necessarily mutually exclusive.
More info on anger counselling options is available here.
Private anger therapy is now available to book. To book sessions, call direct on 0191 580 3700.
In reality, most of us are unaware, at a conscious level, of how an event can affect us, emotionally.
Any event in life that is outside the range of our norms in life - what we believe, what we value, etc, can result in trauma.
Symptoms like desire to be alone, depression, helplessness or hopelessness, and social isolation can all be signs of unresolved trauma that may need professional help to resolve.
We usually think of trauma as being an isolated incident, with it's victims typically portrayed as soldiers in combat, families in a war zone, or victims of domestic violence at home.
Smaller episodes of emotional distress are often dismissed as irrelevant and potentially less deserving of treatment. However the long term effects can be just as damaging as very obvious trauma.
Trauma counselling can help with both short term, one-off, obvious traumatic experiences, as well as longer term issues accrued over time.
By its very nature, trauma work needs an attentive and sympathetic counsellor.
Get full info on trauma counselling.
Questions about trauma counselling? Ring us direct on 0191 580 3700.
Addiction can happen to us in a subtle way, in the background of our life, without us realising.
It's easy to establish a dependence on some means to cope, in the face of unusually high stressors, or an event we weren't expecting.
But, if we continue using this means to cope, it can become a habit, and the only way we know how to cope with the problem.
With too much substance or behaviour abuse comes rationalisation - the belief that the level of stress we're dealing with is now normal - when in fact it is not.
We normally associate addiction with substances like alcohol or drugs, but process or behavioural addictions are now very common, like shoplifting, sex, or food addiction.
Counselling can help gain understanding on the underlying causal issues behind a pattern of behaviour in life. While long term progress takes time, a counsellor can assist you in short term gains by helping you access the right support at times you feel triggered.
Visit our main addiction counselling page, here or, to ask about addiction counselling, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700, or request a callback, here.
Arranging Counselling For The First Time
Meeting Your Counsellor
How often do you expect counselling sessions? What progress do you expect to make? Define fast and slow progress? These expectations can cary widely, so make sure you and your therapist agree on the details, from the outset.
Pricing varies, especially for private counselling. Most therapists offer a complimentary phone chat, to see if you two might work well. Check if your first meeting carries standard charges or not.
Agreeing On Progress Goals
What do you expect from counselling? Are you looking for the shortest possible fix? Or a longer exploration of underlying issues? Set the right expectations, before you begin. Setting clear expectations like this from the ouset leaves you free to focus on the real work of counselling.
Questions For Your Prospective Counsellor Seaton Burn
Asking specific questions before beginning work with a counsellor can help avoid wasted time and money.
How likely is it that I don't feel better after counselling?
- It's important, throughout the sessions you have, to check in with your therapist about the progress you're making, and your expectations of results and timeline going forward. Doing this regularly means everyone understands each other and there are no risks of suddenly ending a diet of counselling sessions unexpectedly, and without support.
How long should therapy for (your issue) last?
- Bear in mind here that this is a very difficult question to answer, with no one solution, as it has so many (very personal) variables and dependencies built in - that are dependent on, for example:
- What comes up during therapy, that needs to be dealt with, that wasn't anticipated beforehand.
- Many more events than anticipated, are contributing toward a current day pattern, and all need resolution before the pattern dissolves or the client feels better.
- Differing rates at which different individuals are able to make sense of, and re-process, events. We all heal at different rates - this is normal.
Accordingly, event the best therapist, will be giving you only their best opinion, of this question.
Also, bear in mind - a counsellor's job is to help you feel better and process events and meanings better, to result in better emotional feelings and mental health. A longer time frame commitment from you, gives the therapist greater confidence in opening up longer term issues for work, they otherwise wouldn't do, with only a shorter time frame available. Events with greater emotional intensity must be managed carefully. A good therapist will make sure there are no emotional loose ends left, at the end of treatment. If you are not open and honest throughout counselling sessions, it can present the possibility of sessions suddenly coming to an end, when emotions are high, and difficult to manage alone.
Do you have research interests, or a specialism in one particular type of counselling?
- Some counsellors can work a lifetime in only one problem area - making them very specialist - and sometimes more sought after. Being prudent with pre-purchase questions like these, will help you ascertain which therapist it's worth taking the counselling journey with.
When will sessions start?
- Counsellors often work across multiple clinics and locations on different days of the week - check if your diaries sync up at the right times.
Therapy In Seaton Burn
Our counsellors are self-employed and independent. We can usually offer counselling sessions at most locations throughout Tyne & Wear, including Seaton Burn, by arrangement.
Arranging Counselling Seaton Burn
To get started with counselling, or just for an initial chat, we're available on 0191 580 3700.
Our counsellors adhere to the BACP code of ethics and practice.
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