Selecting The Best Counsellor Wallsend
Your relationship with your counsellor, is unlike any other.
Your counsellor will understand you, in a unique way, that few (if any) others, do.
It's easy to feel exposed or intimidated, when starting out, until a rapport is established with your counsellor. Making sure you've picked the right counsellor can mean the difference between a few short sessions with an unsuccessful outcome; and lasting positive change in your life.
Finding The Right Therapist/Talk Therapist
Finding the right counsellor means developing a therapeutic association which is based on:
- Safety - First and foremost, we need to feel safe to open up about our concerns, in order to receive the help to overcome them.
- Permission - The therapy room should be a safe space where you have permission to express your feelings in a safe and protected environment. The right counsellor will help pace the feelings and experiences you're describing, while allowing you to express all the associated feelings, untethered.
- Partnership - Working together with your counsellor should feel like a partnership. New ways to look at old events, often come from the therapist to the client. However, if you are not 100% open and honest with the therapist, results achieved may be lacking. If you do not fully reveal the info asked of you, it may take longer to achieve the change you want.
- Equality - Mutual understanding and appreciation is required throughout your counselling session and should underline all your work in the therapy room. e.g. Achieving results too quickly can actually be a bad thing!...if it causes too much discomfort. Be willing to change pace to match your counsellor, within reason. Likewise, as the client, a healthy respect should be maintained for the counsellor to guide you towards an appropriate resolution for each issue, no matter how painful that may be, in the short term. Take motivation from the small wins during initial sessions, as these can fuel you for later working through deeper issues.
- Interested & Attentful - Professional therapists learn extensively on the art and benefits of listening closely during counselling sessions. A wise counsellor is aware, that much more can often be gained by staying silent, and listening closely, not only to what is said, but *how* it is said, in order to better understand a client's position, and be better placed to facilitate greater context (and more comfortable change. Sometimes it's difficult to focus during sessions when feelings are raw and vulnerable. Even at these times, listen to how your counsellor is guiding you toward a better understanding of events, and meanings that are easier to cope with. We often respond to questions with our usual answers, that we routinely give in our normal environment. However, concentrating on the questions asked, and providing answers that are unfiltered, and represent your true thoughts and feelings, will help you achieve results noticeably better, than simply responding with what you think you should respond with.
- Validation - The meanings we give to events, are as varied as human beings themselves. It's important that we feel our meanings are reasonable, given the circumstances. Does your counsellor bring the human elements to therapy? Empathy, validation, and understanding are the only starting point that allow better interpretations of old events, to flourish.
- Hope - We know we need to be more upbeat, eager, and cheerful about events. But that's usually in short supply, when counselling sessions begin. Many of us try to change everything on the outside first, before finally realising the problem is actually inside, not outside. How fast you see results from counselling varies from one individual to another - but it's not a sudden series of overnight wins - more like a gradual campaign of change. Take comfort and faith from the smallest of breakthroughs made during a session - and allow it to build your hope of even better breakthroughs, in future sessions. Hope can carry us through even the darkest of times in life, and hope is important both in and out of the counselling room. What experience does your counsellor have with your issue specifically? How have they helped others, like you, in the past? Use these questions to decide if this counsellor's experience matches your expectations.
- Trust - The inner child, in all of us, seeks to protect us above all else. If the environment is not supportive of vulnerable issues surfacing, they will not be allowed to do so. In counselling, most of us reveal aspects of ourselves and our feelings, we don't reveal to anyone else, even family or loved ones. Working with a counsellor as a neutral observer, can help us access deeper hurts that are ready to heal, as compared to attempting to work with someone we know, or even, on our own. Trust is required that (I) the counsellor can guide the entire counselling journey with you and (ii) they have the skills and competence required to help you resolve each individual hurt, too. Expect a counsellor to challenge you - that's their job. Part of their role is to help you question the meanings you have assigned to certain events - in order to help you feel better about them. Instinctively, having our beliefs and opinions challenged can feel uncomfortable - and we must be willing to trust that the counsellor has positive intentions, in leading us to a better meaning, and thus, better feelings, about it. A professional with more specialism in your particular area of concern may help here.
- Insightful - An external counsellor can be detached from your day to day life - a counsellor is not your friend, and has no investment in pacifying you with total and unequivocal acceptance - (s)he has the impartiality and detachment needed to help you confront your biggest issues head-on, in a way that friends would let slip by, for the sake of not causing a fuss. A trained counsellor can tell the difference between challenging you on an opinion or conclusion that may not be worthwhile, as opposed to helping you look differently at an event that can have a positive impact on your overall mental health. The difference is priceless, in the emotional peace a client experiences, over time.
Depression Counselling In Wallsend
Ironically, depression itself can stop us getting help for depression - making it one of the most debilitating mental health challenges we face.
Depression can be the result of both unuseful thinking patterns and an ongoing state of helplessness or hopelessness. Counselling can help with both.
Some also look at other options for depression, such as herbal remedies e.g. St John's Wort, or supplements such as 5 Hydroxy-Tryptophan. Always seek the advice of your medical professional, for these items.
See more about counselling for depression, here.
To get the counselling options in Wallsend, contact us direct, by calling 0191 580 3700, or completing the form opposite.
Anxiety Counselling Wallsend
The root of anxiety is often based in our learned associations - a repeated experience of negative reinforcement with something specific, can become a more generalised problem later in life, without realising.
Getting help to recognise where the anxiety may be coming from, in the past, can help you break the old association, from current events, and recognise the two are different.
One off events in the past can also be the cause of more acute episodes of anxiety, such as panic attacks.
Getting the help of a therapist can assist you in recognising where a previous association to fear may lie, and how to see it differently. This may help with anxiety experienced current day.
Anxiety can be tackled with a variety of approaches in the counselling room, including EMDR, working on the original trauma, or deconditioning the associated experience.
Long term relief from anxiety can only be gained once your therapist has the information they need. They may ask about how the fear state happens over time, how it manifests specifically, and your current coping mechanisms.
More info about counselling for anxiety is available on our main page here.
Every relationship goes through ups and downs, as part of the human experience. Contrasting viewpoints can arise as a result of upbringing, religion, schooling, or even simple generational differences. All of these can cause seemingly insurmountable issues, without help.
Marriages or civil partnerships can come under strain from issues like contrasting interests, differing priorities, and disagreements about what's important in life.
Tackling relationship issues in counselling is often the first time couples have seriously spoken to each other about what they truly want from life, and what they expect from each other.
Understanding and anticipating what your partner wants and expects from the relationship, needs daily work, and most couples are not clear on this.
In relationships, we are often seeking out a partner (unconsciously) to satisfy unmet needs of the past, or to resolve an issue we've had from a previous relationship. We don't realise this on a conscious level, of course.
Finding your way around these issues can be tricky without experienced help.
We discuss relationship counselling and marriage counselling options in more detail here.
If you want to get started with counselling for your relationship, get in touch by calling 0191 580 3700, or drop us an email at info ((at)) truthcounsellingnewcastle.co.uk.
Bereavement Counselling Wallsend
We usually associate bereavement with the passing of a loved one, or a pet. But we all experience loss differently, and to differing degrees, depending on what the loss relates to. A sense of deep grief or loss can result from being unable to continue a favourite hobby, losing a pet project you've been working on for a while, or enforced retirement.
Simply starting the grieving process can be a challenge itself, as many worry they don't know how to grieve, or feel they should be grieving more, or less, than they are. It's also possible to become stuck in a never-starting, or never-ending cycle of grief, which carries its own complications.
Grief counselling is available to help you begin to process long or short term grief, in a supportive, structured, and safe space.
Full info on grief counselling is available here.
For bereavement counselling costs and availability, call us on 0191 580 3700.
Anger is often the result of one of our most basic beliefs or values being contradicted.
If internal beliefs, or model of the world, is too restrictive, it can become all to easy to shatter internal ideas about how the world should be, thus resulting in an angry outburst.
Irregular bouts of anger can crop up during particularly stressful times or life events, and can be managed temporarily by attempting to alleviate stress in general.
Therapy for anger is quite different - and focuses instead on detective work around past events in life, family life, relationship issues, etc, as a means to get to the root of the anger habit.
It may be that for one individual, both counselling and anger management are suitable for different stages of the individual's journey. They are not necessarily mutually exclusive.
Find out more about anger counselling here.
Our therapists can normally help with counselling for anger issues. To check on costs and ask questions, call us direct on 0191 580 3700.
Often we are unaware of the impact an emotional trauma has, until much later.
A traumatic experience can be anything which sufficiently breaks one's "model of the world" - the beliefs, values, and perceptions we have about how the world works, differences between right and wrong, etc.
Trauma often manifests as a sense of isolation or detachment from life, as if we are looking in at life, but not experiencing it personally.
We often have a fixed idea about what trauma is, with a vision of a helpless person suffering a huge incident.
Multiple smaller traumatic episodes can also result in accumulated emotional difficulties over time, and it can be more difficult to label these issues as in need of acute mental health care, when compared to more impactful, one-off traumas from widely recognised sources.
A trauma counsellor can help with both types of trauma. Some have additional qualifications to assist with specialist interventions such as EMDR, or NLP techniques that have been effective with trauma sufferers in the past.
While attending counselling for the first time can be intimidating, your counsellor has done this many times before. Generally, there is nothing you can say that would surprise them or they have not heard before. The counselling room is the one place it's safe to open up and feel heard.
Our main page on trauma counselling has more info.
To get your trauma counselling questions answered, ring us direct, on 0191 580 3700.
Addiction to a substance or behaviour, usually happens incrementally, over time, and outside our conscious awareness.
e.g. We can develop a pattern of over-eating, in response to a period of high stress. It's natural for us to reach for some way to reduce the emotional discomfort we feel, in situations like this.
But, if we continue using this means to cope, it can become a habit, and the only way we know how to cope with the problem.
With too much substance or behaviour abuse comes rationalisation - the belief that the level of stress we're dealing with is now normal - when in fact it is not.
While most present with an addiction to a substance like alcohol or drugs, an increasing number are developing behavioural addictions which could benefit from counselling, such as collecting or hoarding behaviour, viewing pornography obsessively, or compulsive shopping.
Counselling can help gain understanding on the underlying causal issues behind a pattern of behaviour in life. While long term progress takes time, a counsellor can assist you in short term gains by helping you access the right support at times you feel triggered.
Questions re addiction counselling? Get answers direct on 0191 580 3700.
Your First Counselling Session
The first session is usually used to get to know your counsellor, and they you, and set appropriate expectations for your counselling sessions, for example, frequency, how many, charges, etc.
Pricing varies, especially for private counselling. Most therapists offer a complimentary phone chat, to see if you two might work well. The initial session could be considered a regular session for cost purposes too. Check in advance.
Agreeing On Progress Goals
Normally when beginning counselling, you and your therapist will agree on the goals and outcome you want to achieve, and set a timeline for treatment, and how many sessions you'll complete together. Setting clear expectations like this from the ouset leaves you free to focus on the real work of counselling.
Get Answers For These Important Questions
Answers to the following questions can help you track down the most appropriate therapist for your needs.
How likely is it that I don't feel better after counselling?
- Have regular conversations with your therapist to make sure you stay on track toward your goals. Doing this regularly means everyone understands each other and there are no risks of suddenly ending a diet of counselling sessions unexpectedly, and without support.
How long will this take?
- Understand that this is a question with no one fixed, correct, answer. You're looking here for more of how the counsellor reacts, rather than the content of the answer. In reality, duration will depend on multiple factors:
- What comes up during therapy, that needs to be dealt with, that wasn't anticipated beforehand.
- More past events than expected, may be contributing to the pattern of the problem you're experiencing in the here and now. These events take time to process, and feel better about, and can slow the progress of the main issue you went to counselling for. Nevertheless, they are usually necessary to overcome, for best results.
- Each individual processes emotions and changes of meaning, at a different rate, that is unique to them. The only "not normal" approach would be expecting everyone to feel better at the same rate.
For all these reasons, don't expect a concrete answer to this question - even a very experienced therapist will be giving you their best estimate, before therapy begins - there is no more accurate information available.
Remember, part of the counsellor's job Is to help you open up painful memories or feelings and re-process them, A longer time frame commitment from you, gives the therapist greater confidence in opening up longer term issues for work, they otherwise wouldn't do, with only a shorter time frame available. Naturally, deeper work requires more time. If you are not open and honest throughout counselling sessions, it can present the possibility of sessions suddenly coming to an end, when emotions are high, and difficult to manage alone.
Do you have any specialities?
- Certain types of therapy carry with them, specific types of training or qualifications. Making sure you and your therapist are a match, upfront, makes sense, and could prevent a costly mistake.
How quickly can I begin?
- Therapists are usually busy people, with little spare time between sessions. Getting logistics sorted out now, will help later.
Counsellors Available In Wallsend
Our therapists work independently. Central Newcastle is home to most of our therapists, however we can usually arrange sessions in surrounding Tyne & Wear locations, like Wallsend. Please ask if unsure.
Arranging Counselling Wallsend
To check on availability, costs of counselling in Wallsend, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700.
Our counsellors adhere to the BACP code of ethics and practice.
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