Picking The Right Counsellor Monkseaton
Counselling is a personal experience.
The relationship between you and your counsellor, is a private one.
Professionals are used to dealing with life's personal details, but you may not be so used to opening up in this way. A strong counselling relationship can significantly change your outlook and perspective on key areas of life - it's important to get it right.
Finding The Right Counsellor
A great counselling relationship, with appropriate boundaries, will be based on:
- Safe - The counsellor's room should feel like a sanctuary, sheltered from the external world, or it's concerns, so that we feel secure enough to speak about our worries.
- Permission - The therapy room should be a safe space where you have permission to express your feelings in a safe and protected environment. With the right help, you'll feel like your therapist is able to handle whatever comes up, no matter how you express it.
- Teamwork - Find someone who you can work together with easily, for best outcomes. New ways to look at old events, often come from the therapist to the client. Equally, the counsellor depends on you to be as honest and open as possible, or they have nothing to work with, and little progress can be made. A mutually supportive, collaborative environment can help you get the change you want quickly, with the minimum of discomfort.
- Reciprocal Respect - Strong therapeutic relationships are built on a firm sense of respect and co-operation. e.g. If the speed of work is causing too much upset, or discomfort, speak to your therapist about slowing down so that you match each other's pace, and expectations. Understand that, even through the difficult sessions, the counsellor has a clear path ahead for you, and knows what they are doing. Once you have developed a few positive experiences with a counsellor, of revealing a small issue, and successfully working through it, trust can grow, mutual respect can widen, and motivation can increase, making further progress easier.
- Listening - One of the main counselling tasks is to be a good listener. Understanding non-verbal communication during a session is often just as important for a counsellor, as words spoken aloud. Other times, the therapist may need you to listen - as they guide you towards seeing something from a different perspective. This can be challenging as we have invested a lot of time and energy in our pre-existing beliefs. Rather than giving your rote-learned responses to your therapists questions, try to do your own active listening, instead. Interesting results can be achieved by listening intently to the therapist's question, as though it's the first time you'd heard it.
- Compassion - We all have an intuitive need to connect with others, and have our experiences and interpretations acknowledged as being real, and acceptable. It's important to be able to feel that your counsellor is empathetic to your concerns and upsets, understands how and why you feel the way you do, and yet is also willing and able to help lead you to a better place about the issues you're bringing to therapy.
- Hopeful - Most of us begin the counselling journey at a place where we do desperately need hope. A lot of folks find themselves at counselling sessions as a lst resort - they've tried everything they can think of, already. Results from counselling take time - we are dealing often with long term or deep seated issues, that need solid detective work, before beginning the process of change. Take comfort and faith from the smallest of breakthroughs made during a session - and allow it to build your hope of even better breakthroughs, in future sessions. Hope is a trait we all need, whether we're undertaking counselling or not. To build hope from the start, ask your counsellor about their previous successes, in cases similar to yours. They won't disclose personal details, but the general picture they give you can help build confidence that this is a journey worth taking.
- Trust - Knowing that, when we do put forth our concerns, we can trust a counsellor to assist in the most appropriate way, no matter how deep our emotions or feelings, can allow even the deepest wounds to heal. Part of the reason we're often attending therapy at all, is that a part of us knows, that some meaning we have given an event, is not quite right, and is causing emotions and feelings to arise, too often. More personal hurts can be healed by working with a qualified counsellor, than by attempting to heal ourselves. Trust is required that (I) the counsellor can guide the entire counselling journey with you and (ii) they have the skills and competence required to help you resolve each individual hurt, too. The counsellor is not there to be your friend, however. Part of their role is to help you question the meanings you have assigned to certain events - in order to help you feel better about them. Instinctively, having our beliefs and opinions challenged can feel uncomfortable - and we must be willing to trust that the counsellor has positive intentions, in leading us to a better meaning, and thus, better feelings, about it. Looking for a counsellor with more long term experience can help.
- Perception - The counsellor has the acumen, vision, and understanding to help you identify and remedy, areas where a better perspective on the event(s), may help. Having the insight to see what meanings need to be changed, to feel better, is something best left to the professionals. Your long term mental health can make great gains, where these fine distinctions are clearly recognised.
There are not many ailments which themselves, make it difficult for us to get professional help to remedy them - but depression is one of them.
Counselling can help with both short term and chronic depression, helping you identify and correct the day to day thinking patterns as well as understand the root cause.
Your doctor can advise on other depression treatment options beyond counselling, such as other mental health approaches like CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) or changes to exercise and nutrition. All options should be considered.
Get more info about counselling for depression.
To check on costs and booking options for counselling in Monkseaton, call us direct on 0191 580 3700.
Anxiety Counselling In Monkseaton
Long term generalised anxiety often comes from a learned association - a conditioning experience we've had repeatedly over time, but never really realised the conclusions we were making about it, unconsciously.
Techniques used by counsellors may help reduce the serverity of the anxiety reaction you're used to, as well as help you understand how the pattern of anxiety has developed.
One off events in the past can also be the cause of more acute episodes of anxiety, such as panic attacks.
A counsellor can help you unearth where such an association may lie, and to view it from a different perspective, to help ease current day to day life.
Progress can be made on anxiety when we realise the fear is attributable not to the original stimulus itself - but what we thought it meant. Once we learn to make the distinction between the two, fear is usually lessened.
Your counsellor is best placed to guide you through the best options for you, that will provides the greatest relief over time.
Counselling help for anxiety is available. Call us direct on 0191 580 3700 to arrange.
All relationships go through turbulence, no matter who we are. In fact, relationships with those closest to us, like family, are often the most difficult. The differing interests, beliefs, values, and even generational differences, can unwittingly create tension that is difficult to explain or comprehend fully, without assistance.
For romantic relationships, issues such as infidelity, differences over children, parenting, money, habits, and simply the busy nature of daily life can decay an otherwise strong and healthy relationship.
Counselling can help couples put aside differences and start learning and listening to each other, in earnest.
When you live everyday with your partner, it often takes another third party to step in and help you see the wood for the trees, inside the relationship.
Sometimes a therapist can assist this understanding by helping you see how current patterns, relate to the past, and the previous episodes in life that each partner brings to the relationship.
Even just a few insights from a private relationship therapist can give tremendous progress in how you experience your relationship.
We discuss relationship counselling and marriage counselling options in more detail here.
If you want to get started with counselling for your relationship, get in touch by calling 0191 580 3700, or drop us an email at info ((at)) truthcounsellingnewcastle.co.uk.
Bereavement Counselling Monkseaton
Loss in life is usually related to a loved one or friend passing away. But, loss can also occur in many other forms, too. Losing a job due to unemployment, a partner due to divorce, or contact with a family member can result in loss, and the associated emotional issues to overcome.
Some are just beginning the grieving process and don't feel able to grieve, or feel fully. Sometimes grieving can take over, and dominate the rest of life, in a prolonged state of emotional loss called complicated grieving disorder.
Whether for long or short term grief issues, grief counselling can provide essential support that is often unavailable from other sources.
Find out more about bereavement counselling.
To get started with grief counselling, call us direct, on 0191 580 3700.
Anger Counselling Monkseaton
Anger is often the result of one of our most basic beliefs or values being contradicted.
Excessive anger often results from an excess of internal "rules" or beliefs, making it easy for them to be broken, and it therefore becomes easy to trigger a state of anger.
Periodic angry episodes happen to us all, but more frequent or uncontrollable anger is more likely to require intervention and therapeutic help.
Rather than manage symptoms alone, counselling for anger issues is more likely to help by analysing how previous events in life have led to a pattern of angry behaviour, over time.
It may be that for one individual, both counselling and anger management are suitable for different stages of the individual's journey. They are not necessarily mutually exclusive.
More info on anger counselling options is available here.
Private anger therapy is now available to book. To ask a question or check on availability, you can reach us on 0191 580 3700.
Trauma/PTSD Counselling Monkseaton
Often we are unaware of the impact an emotional trauma has, until much later.
Some traumatic events can keep us in a state of fight/flight until we're able to process them in a more gentle way.
Trauma often manifests as a sense of isolation or detachment from life, as if we are looking in at life, but not experiencing it personally.
A traumatic event can be a big, one-off, sudden, shock.
There is however also a lesser known version of trauma, the small t trauma - often a series of repeating minor episodes, nevertheless still resulting in longer term unresolved emotional distress.
A trauma counsellor can help with both types of trauma. Some have additional qualifications to assist with specialist interventions such as EMDR, or NLP techniques that have been effective with trauma sufferers in the past.
While attending counselling for the first time can be intimidating, your counsellor has done this many times before. Generally, there is nothing you can say that would surprise them or they have not heard before. The counselling room is the one place it's safe to open up and feel heard.
Our main page on trauma counselling has more info.
To get your trauma counselling questions answered, ring us direct, on 0191 580 3700.
Addiction Counselling Monkseaton
It's easy to become addicted to something in the course of day-to-day life, without noticing it happening consciously.
Sometimes, when going through exceptional stress, we adopt a certain way to cope, as a one-off means to feel better.
It's surprisingly easy to continue using this one coping mechanism in this way, and thus end up using it as the *only* coping mechanism, whenever stress arises.
Infact, repeated use of this coping mechanism, can result in a belief that the initial problem itself is acceptable, and encourages us not to address this initial problem, at the root.
Behavioural addictions, or process addictions, like OCD, hoarding, eating, etc, are now just as common as classic substance addictions, like cigarettes or drugs.
Counselling can help gain understanding on the underlying causal issues behind a pattern of behaviour in life. While long term progress takes time, a counsellor can assist you in short term gains by helping you access the right support at times you feel triggered.
For advice on addiction counselling options, ring us direct on 0191 580 3700.
Getting Started With Counselling
Getting To Know Each Other
The first session is usually used to get to know your counsellor, and they you, and set appropriate expectations for your counselling sessions, for example, frequency, how many, charges, etc.
Some counsellors offer the first session free, to see if you are a good fit together. The initial session could be considered a regular session for cost purposes too. Check in advance.
Have an open and frank discussion with your counsellor at the beginning, so that you see eye to eye on what will happen next. Dealing with these issues up front makes it easier to get on with the job at hand, later.
Questions For Your Prospective Counsellor Monkseaton
Getting answers to well chosen queries up front will help you make the right decision about what counsellor to choose.
What if I don't get results?
- Have regular conversations with your therapist to make sure you stay on track toward your goals. Doing this regularly means everyone understands each other and there are no risks of suddenly ending a diet of counselling sessions unexpectedly, and without support.
How many sessions should this issue take, in your experience?
- Bear in mind here that this is a very difficult question to answer, with no one solution, as it has so many (very personal) variables and dependencies built in - that are dependent on, for example:
- Elements from the past, that surface during treatment, that require treatment before the primary complaint can be attended to.
- More past events than expected, may be contributing to the pattern of the problem you're experiencing in the here and now. These events take time to process, and feel better about, and can slow the progress of the main issue you went to counselling for. Nevertheless, they are usually necessary to overcome, for best results.
- All of us move at our own speed in therapy, with the time taken to evaluate events, find better alternatives, and have appropriate insights, varying from one person to another. Expecting anything different would not be appropriate.
Therefore, please do not expect a definitive answer to this question.
Remember, part of the counsellor's job Is to help you open up painful memories or feelings and re-process them, If the counsellor is under the impression that your sessions are a regular, long-term event, they may help you open up more painful memories or events, with the intention of greater healing possibilities. Looking at these more difficult events can take a longer time period. If you are not open and honest throughout counselling sessions, it can present the possibility of sessions suddenly coming to an end, when emotions are high, and difficult to manage alone.
What is your background in counselling?
- Some counsellors have historical experience or specialist qualifications in particular areas of therapy, such as trauma or PTSD, anxiety, depression, etc. Making sure you and your therapist are a match, upfront, makes sense, and could prevent a costly mistake.
When will sessions start?
- Tracking down a specialist with expertise in your issue is one thing - but are they free to work with you? Don't forget to check.
Counselling Sessions Monkseaton
Our counsellors are self-employed and independent. Since they travel independently too, our therapists can often arrange local sessions in Monkseaton, by arrangement.
How To Book Counselling Sessions
Get your counselling queries answered, and find out if we might work well together, by ringing direct on 0191 580 3700.
Our counsellors adhere to the BACP code of ethics and practice.
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